Me and my friend Jared, had our graduation party this Sunday and it was pretty sweet. We set up then grabbed Chipotle before with my girl Anni and my sister. Then we got back and a ton of people came! More than I thought would come. I haven’t even looked/touched my cards and we still have so much left over food and cake and drinks. I think everyone really enjoyed themselves and had a great time. I’m so thankful for all these wonderful people in my life.
So I have been so freaking busy! Alright May so far: Anni got home, and things were freaking awesome. We had Prom and then a few other dates and she took me out to get pictures done and dinner for my birthday which was on the 9th. I turned 18 and some of my friends took me out for lunch one day too. She was gone for a weekend at the Players Tournament down in Florida. Anni and I, mostly me got off track for about a week and that was no fun. I was gone this weekend at the beach, so that was fun, I wish she could have come. But things are back to normal we had an awesome golf date tonight! We went out and played a few holes, and Anni made us some snacks. She made me a sandwich and it was delicious. We had so much fun this after noon at golf and at dinner this evening. We laughed and laughed, we didn’t argue about anything really the whole night and we just talked and talked and laughed and laughed and kissed and kissed. This is what I want the rest of the summer to be like. And I know it will be like this! I graduate on the 1st of June and cannot wait because that means I’m forever done with school and will have so much more time with Anni and with work. I have a graduation party this Sunday with Jared which will be fun! Anyway things are awesome and I am falling in love more and more with this girl everyday like I did through the year but now even more because she is here and we are having an amazing time, and technically my summer has not even started.
Because during the summer, I don’t get to spend time with my friends. My real friends. I honestly have maybe 3 REAL friends here….
I miss my teammates the most. The people I spend everyday with. Every meal with. Every evening with.
I honestly don’t know how I will survive this summer without them….
Because so far this summer is pretty dry.
I need friends.
I need my work to start to keep me busy (since Jacob is WAY too busy for me)
This I so not even true I’m not even busy I’m gone for like 3 days. Your the one who like just randomly takes a trip to New York for a week, then maybe California to work the same job I’m working now just across the county for a few months. And plus working all day every day and nights and weekends. So yeah I’m pretty sure after this week or the rest of summer I will be saying your too busy for me.
I hate feeling like this. I just want school to be over. I just want me and Anni to be back to normal. I just want to enjoy my summer with her. I just want this week to be over. I just want to stop hating myself. I just want to stop being so unsatisfied with life. I just need something to do. I want more people to hang out with. I want to do spontaneous random ass things with Anni. I want to stop driving Anni away with my horrible moods. I want to stop digging myself a deeper hole. I feel in debt. I feel like a few bad previous actions and choices are not allowing me to make good actions and choices now. The consequences of my previous actions are just making me fall right back into the groove of bad actions. Really though I have no one to blame but myself. I’m so stupid.